I was at the market wearing a Gracie t-shirt. The cashier saw it and started talking. Said he used to see Helio in the academy sometimes. He started naming people he used to roll with. And he talked about how good he used to be.

He never once said he missed it. He just kept talking.

I told him he could always go back.

He said it’s been too long. He wouldn’t want to start over.

That’s what it looks like years after stopping. It was just one out of a few times I’d heard something like that.

Most things you do, you can quit and lose nothing. Park league softball. The spin class. The pickup basketball games on Sundays. Quit any of them and you’ll find something else to use up the hour or two. Not much really changes. That’s normal.

No one looks back five years later and says, “I wish I never quit softball.”

Jiu-jitsu doesn’t work that way.

That’s why “I used to do jiu-jitsu” never sounds like “I used to play softball.” One is a fact. The other is a confession.