Jiu-Jitsu Letter

Big Magic

Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic isn’t about jiu-jitsu. At all. It’s about creativity, but there are lessons for anyone learning jiu-jitsu, or anything else.

You don’t get any special credit, is what I’m saying, for knowing how to be afraid of the unknown.


Frustration is not an interruption of your process; frustration is the process. The fun part (the part where it doesn’t feel like work at all) is when you’re actually creating something wonderful, and everything’s going great, and everyone loves it, and you’re flying high. But such instants are rare. You don’t just get to leap from bright moment to bright moment. How you manage yourself between those bright moments, when things aren’t going so great, is a measure of how devoted you are to your vocation, and how equipped you are for the weird demands of creative living. Holding yourself together through all the phases of creation is where the real work lies.


So the question is not so much “What are you passionate about?” The question is “What are you passionate enough about that you can endure the most disagreeable aspects of the work?”


People don’t do this kind of thing because they have all kinds of extra time and energy for it; they do this kind of thing because their creativity matters to them.


It starts by forgetting about perfect.


So many of us believe in perfection, which ruins everything else, because the perfect is not only the enemy of the good; it’s also the enemy of the realistic, the possible, and the fun.


Perfectionism stops people from completing their work, yes–but even worse, it often stops people from beginning their work.


The most evil trick about perfectionism, though, is that it disguises itself as a virtue.


We all spend our twenties and thirties trying so hard to be perfect, because we’re so worried about what people will think of us. Then we get into our forties and fifties, and we finally start to be free, because we decide that we don’t give a damn what anyone thinks of us. But you won’t be completely free until you reach your sixties and seventies, when you finally realize this liberating truth—nobody was ever thinking about you, anyhow.


I saw it as proof that you must never surrender, that no doesn’t always mean no, and that miraculous turns of fate can happen to those who persist in showing up.


I believe that curiosity is the secret. Curiosity is the truth and the way of creative living. Curiosity is the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end.


There is a famous question that shows up, it seems, in every single self-help book ever written: What would you do if you knew that you could not fail? But I’ve always seen it differently. I think the fiercest question of all is this one: What would you do even if you knew that you might very well fail?


What do you love doing so much that the words failure and success essentially become irrelevant?


What you absolutely must not do is turn around and walk out. Otherwise, you will miss the party, and that would be a pity, because–please believe me–we did not come all this great distance, and make all this great effort, only to miss the party at the last moment.

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